I just passed the second anniversary of donating a kidney to a former stranger, now a friend. And I will tell the story sometime about how that all came to be, but today I just wanted to write down a few things I learned.
My brain is iffy, but my body is strong. I always had this nagging fear that there was some hidden thing really wrong with my health. But I had so many tests leading up to this transplant, and I forced so many medical people, both doctors and friends, to review the tests that I know for a fact that I am very, very healthy. That is a gift and on some level, a relief.
Being different is a good thing. When it comes to schools of thought, I’m the fish swimming in the other direction a lot of the time. In the stories of other living donors, I have seen that our road less traveled is saving lives. (Is that enough cliches in one paragraph?) We are a little peculiar in that we see kidney donation as this very obvious thing. I have two; you need one or you will not live very long. Here, take one. Simple.
Set your mind on what you want. I don’t know how to describe to you how afraid I was of needles when I started the donation process. But I said to myself, “This is not about me, it is not for me. This is about something bigger, and I will get through this.” And I made it through all the blood draws and three or four IV ports without crying, fainting or whining. Much.
People want to get involved when good things happen. Friends and co-workers took care of my dogs and cats, got my car fixed while I was in the hospital, threw me a couple of parties and donated a good chunk of cash to my recipient’s medical bills. It made them happy to be part of it, and I really appreciated the help.
My aim is true. I have made some pretty radical decisions in my life. I’ve picked up and moved across the country any number of times (OK, four times). I live in a house shaped like half a grapefruit. I’ve taken some big chances on love. I’ve changed careers several times. I’ve taken in some pets that no one else would have. And I donated a kidney to a stranger. Aside from the romances, it’s all worked out pretty well, particularly the kidney donation.
I have man kidneys. Surgical teams see you as a collection of parts, and they make observations about those parts without really thinking about it. So I learned by paying attention that I have freakishly little body fat for a woman my age, and I have the largest kidneys that two leading transplant surgeons had ever seen on a healthy woman. Well, I have one and Anthony has one. His doctor occasionally still exclaims, “Where did you get this thing?!”
There is nothing better than placing your body where your spirit already dwells. I believe that people are interconnected and obligated by their coexistence on this planet to help each other. I believe that any act, however small, to make the world a better place is valuable. Putting my faith in these ideas to the test by giving a kidney to a stranger was an amazing and profound experience.
So that’s me, two years in. I’d do it again tomorrow.